When did it become crazy to go out alone? In an age where singleness runs rampant and there seems to be a new loneliness epidemic being reported daily, why is it considered radical to take yourself out on dates? Where did the term “solo date” even come from? I feel […]
Letters From Vintessa
What Dating Looks Like When You’re Not Looking For A Husband
When dating, it’s normal to come to the scene with a list of yeses and nos, a timeline, and a no-nonsense plan. You’re supposed to date with a clear mind and intention. The goal has been to find a suitable mate. But lately, the tides have turned, and some women […]
Why Date When You’re Perfectly Happy at Home?
Something is stirring in the dating world. We as women are becoming happily single. I know, shocking. We’ve begun repairing and building happy relationships with other women, creating a life that doesn’t need a partner. As we embrace solo life, we’ve begun asking: why am I dating again? Why am […]
In Defense of the Fuck Boy
Do People Still Say Fuck Boys? We all know who they are. They’re promoters for a party, a guy constantly in between relationships who’s only looking to get laid and leaves once things get too deep or real. These are the guys who leave multiple women confused, wondering what they […]
Healing Journey Full Circle: Now What?
For 6 years I’ve been on a healing journey. I was in and out of therapy and analyzing why I behave the way that I do. Is it childhood trauma? Is it depression, religious guilt, shame, anxiety? Short answer: yes. Yes to all that. I have an answer to why […]
When Did Life Become So Serious?
When did life become so serious? When did everyday life become about locking in and reaching this big goal, and if you meet someone who is not taking it seriously, then leave? Not worth it. They’re a distraction. Like why? Why and when did things become not fun anymore? The […]
Maybe I Just Need to Get Out of the House: When Cozy Life Gets Too Cozy
I have a confession: social media is ruining my brain. I’m sorry, it is. I moved to a new city and slowly my friend circle dwindled away to the point where I might go out every few weeks. So most nights, I’m on the phone scrolling, binge-watching a show, or […]
Are We Expecting Too Much From Hookups, or Is the Bar in Hell?
Is it odd that sometimes we hold hookups to the same standards as we would someone in a relationship? We know it’s casual. We know that we don’t want anything to come from the relationship, yet sometimes we hold them to the same standard as we would a long-term partner. […]
The Thing About Married Friends When You’re Single
I’m at the age now where there are more married friends than single ones. If they’re not married, they’re trying to get married or getting a divorce. I like to keep in touch with my married friends and relationship-oriented people in my life, because I enjoy hearing different perspectives on […]
What I Realized From Spending A Year Alone
My biggest realization from spending a year by myself is that I might be the problem. Not in the most toxic way, but I have a nasty habit of hyperfixating on one thing, one outcome, and pouring my all into it, then feeling like a failure if it doesn’t happen […]