Over the years and through my many journeys and lives, I realized one thing: I didn’t like myself. I wasn’t a vibe, and I treated myself as such. I would need substances to deal with myself, and distractions. I surrounded myself with negative people that weren’t good for me.

I know I’m not the only person. I’ve met older people who don’t like themselves and have never learned to love themselves in all their long lives. They just get through the day. It’s upsetting.

I figured it might be something as simple as not knowing how to love ourselves—outside of a spa day or a special food treat. And those are nice, but there’s some inner work that needs to be done. Caring for your inner self is important. Once you start and make it a practice, it becomes second nature.

Here are some of the ways I love myself on days I can’t go to a spa:

Journaling

Simply writing out my thoughts and feelings with prompts helps me see what’s going on in my brain. I listed out some of my favorite prompts in Soft Spells—you can grab it here at the shop. It’s not about being profound, it’s just about getting honest with yourself. Even a few lines can shift my whole mood.

Spending time in nature

Going out and admiring nature is so calming. I’ll leave my phone at home or just keep it in my pocket and go for a walk. Watching the squirrels and the birds run around, just living their lives—it’s not only calming, it’s sometimes a little funny. It reminds me that life doesn’t always have to be so serious.

Cooking A Delicious Meal

Cooking is a way I nurture my body. I’ll find a healthy meal or maybe something comforting and try it one night. Pour a glass of wine, play a playlist or podcast I love, and just let the kitchen become my little sanctuary. It’s not about making it fancy—it’s about caring for yourself through something so simple and necessary.

Moving Your Body (Besides Exercise)

Dancing has to be one of the most freeing things you can do without spending money. Some nights, I turn on my record player, listen to my favorite songs, and just move. I let the rhythm take over and let my body sway however it feels right. It’s about releasing energy and reconnecting with my body.

Creating a Sacred Space

The most loving thing you can do for yourself is give yourself a safe space to rest. My home has become a refuge for me—my own little world in the middle of the city where I can disconnect from everything and just be. Creating this sanctuary and coming home to it has been the greatest act of self-care, and the love I show my space reflects how much I care for myself.

If you want to create a cozy, peaceful spot of your own, I made a simple guide to help you build your own sanctuary at home. Check it out here—it’s been a game changer for me.

Self-care and love can come in so many ways. Whatever feeds you—let it. Even if it’s not on this list. Just focus on loving and accepting yourself, and try to see the bigger picture. You are amazing in your own way. You’re unique, and that deserves to be honored.

So, jot your thoughts down. Go on a hot girl walk. Eat something that makes you feel good.
You deserve it.