Every day around 4 o’clock, there’s a couple in my complex who walk their two dogs — a pug and a corgi. They always walk closely, the husband’s arms wrapped tightly around his wife’s waist, his head resting on her shoulder, hers on his. The dogs sniff and wander all around them.
At first glance, I thought it was sweet. But months passed, and I kept seeing them — up hills, down sidewalks, even on 85-degree days — still wrapped up in each other. This couple, probably in their 60s, carried the same gentle affection they must have had when they were young.
They found it. Something that feels so rare now.
In an age where “loneliness epidemic” is plastered across headlines, so many people are craving connection. Something to make life feel like more than just another loop of work, TV, and the occasional text. We want love. We want friendship. We want to feel something.
So we do what we’ve been taught — we date the way TV shows us through apps, swipes, quick coffees, maybe a decent conversation. We don’t feel the spark, but we try again. Swipe, match, repeat. Eventually, we meet someone who’s “fine.” They don’t excite us, but they’re not awful either. And we stay.
Because we think at least we’re not alone… right?
But that’s the trap. That’s why we stay in soulless relationships. We fear the silence, the solitude. So instead of choosing ourselves, or holding space for a real connection, we fill the void with convenience.
It’s easy. They’re there. They don’t make your life harder. So… why not?
Here’s why not:
Because it’s not what you want.
It doesn’t make you happy.
It doesn’t fill the void.
What if, instead of rushing to date or make friends, we just… slowed down?
What if we went to places, not to “find someone” — but just to be?
Go to a local shop, a museum, or a park. Become a regular. Smile. Talk if you feel like it. Let connections happen organically. Don’t force the spark.
When you keep showing up, you might run into someone familiar. Eventually, it becomes, “Hey, good to see you again.” That’s how real friendship grows. One moment, one hello, one small shared experience at a time.
That couple I mentioned? They didn’t start off walking arm in arm. It took years and years of learning each other’s rhythms, where to hold the leash, how to match footsteps. Years of bumps in the road, hot days, and probably a few arguments too. But they built something steady.
And you will too.
If we slow down, listen to life, and let things unfold, we’ll find the kind of connection that holds steady — even on the hottest days.
“Nature never rushes, yet everything gets done.” – Tao Te Ching
With love & moonlight,
Vintessa
Sacred musings | Mystic practices | Soft heart, wild spirit