The Tranquil Vintessa

The other day I had a breakdown while I was out. One of those dramatic, I don’t know why I feel the urge to cry but I do moments.

I was able to rush to my car and play music while I broke down in peace.

I still couldn’t tell you why I burst out like that, and I’ve taught myself not to overthink it. Crying is a natural human response to feeling overwhelmed. It’s nothing to be ashamed of no matter how much society tries to convince you otherwise.

After some reflection and on-the-spot journaling, I came to the realization that I just have a sensitive heart. I feel deeply. I wear my heart on my sleeve.

I like to think that I’m some mysterious being who lives in the shadows of life, but I’m not. I’m a girl who turned into a woman who has learned to live softly and that includes having a soft heart.

I chose a long time ago that while I can learn from my mistakes and the misdeeds of others, it’s not my responsibility to make others pay. Nor is it my job to remain hardened because of my past. It’s the past for a reason, and I’m tired of living there.

Living life with a sensitive heart isn’t easy. The world is harsh, to say the least, and sometimes you can’t run off and cry like a Disney princess.

Sometimes you have to stand up and fight like one instead.

There is beauty and strength in allowing yourself to feel your emotions and being transparent in a world that constantly tells you to toughen up. When you just want to grow flowers and bake bread, and somehow still be tender in a world that isn’t.

I’ve learned to do both.

You see it in this blog in the stories I tell and the rituals I keep. I’ve created a life where I can wear my dresses, cook from scratch, and embrace my feminine, sensitive nature while still being tough when needed.

Living life with a sensitive heart doesn’t mean you’re always hurt or crying. It means you love deeply. You care. You laugh. You show your emotions freely and authentically.

To be sensitive means you cry. It means you get overwhelmed. But you get up and handle business after you feel your feelings.

To be sensitive does not mean you’re weak. It means you have the courage to feel while others hide it deep down.

So after I cried, I wiped my tears, put on my lip gloss, and went back out to live my life.

Because sometimes you just need to cry, fix your makeup, and continue on with your day like nothing happened.